Parenthood

Sep 26, 2009
“I hope that someday soon we can brainwash the baby into falling asleep a little earlier,” the wife said to her husband, “because I would really like a little alone time with you.” What the wife said: I need some snuggling →MORE...

Sep 24, 2009
Donald and I spend a ludicrous and embarrassing amount of time holding our baby and saying to one another that she is just so beautiful.  There has never been another baby so ravishing.  We got the best baby EVER.  And gee →MORE...

Sep 21, 2009
When I breastfeed my daughter, I do not use a blanket. Now, look.  I gave the blanket trick a good run.  Really, I did.  But it just doesn’t work for me.  It’s a lot like pregnant sex: VERY AWKWARD. First of →MORE...

Sep 14, 2009
Dear Charlie, You have been breathing and sleeping and pooping for eight weeks now.  The strange thing about this is that I think EIGHT WEEKS ALREADY?! and ONLY EIGHT WEEKS?! simultaneously.  How can you have grown so much in less than →MORE...

Do you see that?  That?  Right there?  Yeah.  That’s spit-up. Poor Donald.