Eleven signs that motherhood has swallowed me whole.
February 25, 2010

Alternatively titled: THIS IS THE BEST DAMNED CHOICE I EVER MADE.

1.    When I hear a love song on the radio, I think of Charlotte.

2.    Watching her wake up is the highlight of my day.

3.    I lost my hairbrush for two days last week and nobody noticed a difference.  NOT A SOUL.

4.    My two most frequent destinations are the park and the library.

5.    At night, sometimes my lips are numb from blowing too many raspberries on Charlotte’s belly.

6.    I talk about poop that is not mine.  A lot.

7.    The former me who was afraid of exploding vaginas has been replaced by somebody obsessed with pregnancy and birth and babies.

8.    My entire life revolves around one daily life-changing event: NAPTIME.

9.    Picking up the mail is exciting because it means I might see a neighbor and have a conversation!  With an adult!  Not about poop!

10.    The quickest way to my heart is not through chocolate.  It’s through adoring my child.

11.    Somehow a baby wound up in my laundry basket.


Earning her keep.

***  Check out Lauren’s interview if you have a chance!


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  1. By Alice on February 25, 2010

    Simply adorable!

  2. By SarahGamble@crazylovegamblestyle on February 25, 2010

    Okay so this post got me thinking.  Before Ava was born I VOWED not to let my husband play second fiddle.  I would put OUR relationship first (as much as you can with a baby) but now, two years later?  I can’t say that I succeeded.  I adore my husband but if I am being honest the overwhelming love affair I have with my daughter has sort of blown him out of the water.  I try to balance it but she still wins hands down.  I hope to even that out as she gets older but she is so little, innocent and needy now.  Plus we are going to have another baby so it is only bound to get more complicated.

    Do you feel that Donald comes in second?

  3. By Sarah A. Schlothan Christensen on February 25, 2010

    I am probably going to get flamed something fierce for this, but I know that Donald comes in second.  I come in second for him and he comes in second for me, and that is all there is to it.  Both of us feel very strongly that we would not have married the other if we felt that one another would not understand coming in second.

    I love Donald and I know that he loves me, but a marriage is never guaranteed to last.  Conversely, your child is your child until the end of time.  We make time for one another, of course, and attend to the health of our relationship as best we can, but yeah, we both play second fiddle.  Definitely.

  4. By on February 25, 2010

    Do you think the sex of the baby matters for men? For example, I have a little boy. My hubby is constantly telling me I spoil him. In fact, the CIO debate is a constant in our house (thats what happens when your baby wakes 8 times a night, every night. Yes I said 8) Hubby says let him cry it will toughen him up a little. I asked of we had a girl would let her cry? He looked at me like I had spoken some sort of alien language. Girl.. cry…WHAT?!?!?! Never, he would never ever let his little girl CIO. I love hubby with all of my heart, but the love I feel for aiden is completely indescribable. Like your post falling head over heals in love… only better. Hubby is a very close second in my book, but maybe Aiden comes in a very close second for him.

  5. By mommica on February 25, 2010

    Ditto. Alicia Keys’ “No One” is “our” song.

  6. By Julia on February 25, 2010

    Can totally relate to your list.  I love seeing other mothers adore their babies/motherhood as much as I do.  I’m glad you’re using your site to encourage others and share just how incredible motherhood is (and encourage reading!)

    With the above comments though - I still believe that one of the most important things to a child is them knowning that their parent’s marriage is doing great.  I think that even at a very tiny age, they can sense if everything is okay or not and impacts their sense of security greatly.  They know their whole world will change if they don’t have their parents!  Because of this, Tyson and I purposefully show affection in front of our baby (Tyson comes and kisses me right away when he gets home, etc).  Nothing makes our baby smile like when he sees us kiss :)!  And then he runs over and squeezes inbetween :).

  7. By Heidi on February 25, 2010

    Very cute post!  And I love the bottom right picture…what a cutie!  :)

  8. By Julia on February 25, 2010

    oh and my favorites are probably 2, 3, and 4.  I think I’ve been to the park and library more in the last year and a half than I have my entire life!

  9. By Mrs. Sitcom on February 25, 2010

    Sounds heavenly - I can’t wait :)  PS The bottom-right picture is my favorite!

  10. By Sarah A. Schlothan Christensen on February 25, 2010

    Julia - I guess I should clarify that I believe that having a strong marriage is going to be fundamentally beneficial for Charlotte.  Like Tyson, as soon as Donald comes home from work, he greets me with a kiss and we talk about our days, etc.  What I mean is that if I have to pull one of them out of a burning building, well, poor Donald.  I value him, I value our marriage, and I do my best to ensure that we are still good together…but Charlotte always comes first.

    I think it works well for us because he feels the same way.  I wouldn’t want it any other way.

    Nicole - I don’t know, maybe for some men and not for others?  I have no idea!

  11. By kootnygirl on February 25, 2010

    I love reading stories like this.  I wish that I had been more present when my babies were little.  I obsessed over them, surely, but I don’t think I revelled in them enough.  The longing for nap-time, adult conversation and a good hair day seemed overwhelming at the time.

    I think I’ve been doing a much better job of adoring, and living in every moment, in the last 3 or 4 years.

    Although my relationship with my husband has changed, I can’t say that I put the kids before him, or him before them.  I think we all put Family first, but what that exactly means changes from day to day.

  12. By erin on February 25, 2010

    What you mean is, you would pull Charlotte out of the burning building because Donald is an adult and can handle himself without you, right?  RIGHT? ;)

    Just kidding.  Brian comes in second and he knows it, and loves it, and I come in second to him too, and I love that.

    Most evenings when Brian comes home from work I come in second too, but then I was gone yesterday afternoon and Brian had her, and when I came home it was like all the light had come back into her life.  She grinned, and I remembered why I am still alive.  THANK YOU, God.

    Sign #12: Pretty much every picture on my camera has my baby in it somewhere.  Because I just worship her cuteness.

  13. By SarahGamble@crazylovegamblestyle on February 25, 2010

    That cracked me up, poor Donald.  Don’t worry he will get himself out of the building. 

    I value Ava seeing our marriage as strong, dependable and teaching her what to look for in a man and a marriage.  I too am okay with her coming first though.  She is blessed to be loved like this by both of us. 

    I love the way you love Charlotte, every child deserves THAT!  Bravo!

  14. By Sarah A. Schlothan Christensen on February 25, 2010

    Erin - THAT IS SIGN NUMBER ONE!  I just botched up the list, apparently.

    Also, Charlotte has only just started doing that thing where she lights up every time she sees me and panics when she doesn’t.  I can tell that it’s going to be an exhausting phase, but I LOVE IT, I really do.

    Sarah G - Let’s hope he does!  =P I completely agree with you, by the way, about my daughter learning what to value in a man and a marriage.  I honestly believe that I found a man like Donald and have a marriage like ours in large part because my father was always a good man and good father.

  15. By Elizabeth on February 25, 2010

    Sigh.  Sounds good to me :)

  16. By on February 26, 2010

    When we were starting our family, the show 30Something was on and the tag line in every couple arguement in that show was “What about MY needs”. It made us roll our eyes.  “My Needs”, IMO is a revolving target. Charlotte comes first because she MUST have you to survive and thrive. You need to love her madly so that you won’t lose your mind and throw her under the bus on a really bad day. As grown-ups, you guys get this and make room for her in your love. It will be interesting to see how you accomadate and love each child as they join your family. Everyone does it differently and again, I think it is a revolving deal. Anyone bleeding or on fire gets their needs met first so to speak.As they kids get older, they can learn to deal for awhile so that mom and dad get to take care of their needs as a couple.

  17. By Catch The kids on February 26, 2010

    Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy!

  18. By Cynthia on February 26, 2010

    Erin - Isn’t it amazing when you’re gone for a period of time and when you see baby again, (s)he lights up and remembers where all her love was supposed to go? I just love that feeling.

    Sarah - Luke comes second to Isla too… I don’t think I come second to Luke yet, but Isla will trump me eventually. It’s important that the babes always come first… Luke and I have our alone time too, and I think we spent the first three years of marriage building a solid foundation.

    And I love, love, LOVE, sign one. I have a playlist called “Songs for Isla” and it has everything from Love Me Tender (Elvis) to Sweet Child O’ MIne (Guns n’ Roses). My official song for Isla is Everything by Michael Buble. Ooh, also look for God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You by N’Sync… Cheesy band (that coming from a certified Backstreet Boys FREAK) and kinda cheesy song, but oh it makes me cry.

  19. By on February 26, 2010

    I can’t comment on this particularly because I don’t have kids but I wonder; what happens when you have the second baby? Do you love both the children equally or do you always love the first baby more?

  20. By carolina on February 26, 2010

    so i found my way over here via tabitha’s site…and I don’t mean to suck up, but your Child IS GORGEOUS. What a princess…And you’re quite funny, so I might stay a while…

  21. By Sarah A. Schlothan Christensen on February 26, 2010

    Corrinne - I would think you love them equally but differently.  Like you love two siblings equally but differently, you know?

  22. By erin on February 26, 2010

    Cynthia, yes it IS wonderful!  When I came in, I tried to hide at first, because I had groceries in the car that I needed to bring in and I didn’t want her to scream while I did it because she couldn’t get to me.  But I couldn’t resist seeing her little body light up when she saw me. :)

    I heard the other day that every mother wants to know that their children can live without them… but they also never want to know that their children can live without them.  So true!

  23. By Cynthia on February 26, 2010

    Erin - Isla starts to cry as soon as she hears my voice… I found that out the hard way. It makes me feel bad for the husbands, because (I don’t know about your little one, but) Isla only reacts that way to me… I don’t think she could care less about daddy. I love how their entire body’s react to their happiness… Limbs flailing, huge happy smile, and possibly some sort of screeching.

    Corrine - I explained my love for our future children as little pockets of love. I have all these little pockets and every time we’re blessed with a new baby, another pocket opens. At least, that’s how I feel.

  24. By on February 26, 2010

    Sarah- hmm, I only have one sibling, but I have two parents and I can’t say I love one over the other; just differently. So I guess it’s like that.

  25. By Sarah A. Schlothan Christensen on February 26, 2010

    Ooh, I think Cynthia’s explanation is a good one.  I’m going to plagiarize her.  Or.  Steal her quote.  Or whatever.  YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

    Erin - That is so true.  Earlier today, I was thinking the same thing, that I want to know that if something were to happen to me, Charlotte would be okay.  But at the same time, I don’t want to know that either of us could survive without the other.  Such a strange emotion!

  26. By teetotaled on February 27, 2010

    Great list. It is amazing how any sappy song can make me burst into tears now….just thinking about my daughter.


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