Can you spell that for me?
October 08, 2010

One of the most difficult parts of interacting with other mothers is plastering on a smile when they tell me their child’s name.  My general feeling is that if I have to ask how to spell your kid’s name and it isn’t a hand-me-down from a dead aunt then I should be allowed to cough and sputter and say WHAT?  YOUR KID IS NAMED WHAT?!

Oh, don’t look at me like that.  If you have encountered even one parent who did not saddle their child with a name from a kindergarten reader, something like David or Jane, then you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about.  I’m talking about the parent who turns to you at the park and introduces herself.  Hi, I’m Jennifer (totally normal name) and that’s my son in the blue (totally normal color).  He’s three years old (totally normal age) and his name is Mooneye.

Soooooooo not a normal name.

And then there’s silence.  And somehow you are expected to not choke on your lunch, tack on a grin, and say, WOW, what a beautiful name.  Mooneye.  GOLLY, I just can’t imagine a better name for that little cutie-pie.  No sirree.

This is a true story, by the way.  I have literally met a child named Mooneye.  Also: Plutonious, Augusterine, Jaiykub, Springleigh, Goldette, LaHynes, Madkyn.  I mean, seriously?

WAS THAT THE BEST YOU COULD DO?

Now, look.  I don’t have much room to talk.  The other day I said that Hubert wasn’t an awful MIDDLE NAME because, really, who cares about middle names?  Everybody knows the only time you hear a middle name is about five seconds before your mother races out of the house with a riding crop, set to whip your ass.  But anyway, I said HUBERT, NOT A BAD MIDDLE NAME, and my husband bent over in half and nearly died from laughing so hard.  Some of his brain may have actually fallen out of his nose, THAT is how hard he laughed.

Which, honestly, would explain a lot.  BUT I DIGRESS.

My point is: I’m not a naming guru.  I love unique names as much as the next person.  For crying out loud, my daughter’s middle name is Anais, which every teenage boy will happily tell you is a great set-up for a taunt about anuses.

And I completely understand the desire to bestow a stand-alone name upon your cherished, beloved bundle of undeveloped neural pathways.  After all, that little something the stork delivered is awfully special.  There are probably only a couple hundred thousand babies JUST LIKE THEM.  They deserve an exceptional name, don’t they?

I’m just not positive that Mooneye is really where you want to go with that, you know?

Oh.  What’s that?  Mooneye is your kid’s name?

Well GOLLY, I just can’t imagine a better name for that little cutie pie.  No sirree.

What’s the most horrid name you’ve ever come across?


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  1. By Gena @ WeAreGeis on October 08, 2010

    La-a

    Pronounced LaDasha. I shit you not.

    Also: Abcde (ab-suh-dee) and Lil’Shawn (father’s name is Shawn and YES the apostrophe is on the birth cert.).

  2. By Emily on October 08, 2010

    Our son’s name is Jericho; we get some funny responses with that one. But we like that it’s different and more importantly, it holds beautiful symbolism and meaning for us. We want to give our kids names that actually mean something to us.

    We have friends with sons named Athanasius (goes by Athan) and Caedmon, and friends with daughters named Psalm and Selah. Oh and if we have another boy, we might name him Ignatius. ;-)

  3. By Rebecca on October 08, 2010

    To be honest, I couldn’t really tell you. Sure, I’ve come across kids with names that make me go “What!?“ but most of the time the spellings and pronunciations are so ridiciculous that I can’t remember them.

    I did read something one time that stated a woman named her daughter Female (feh- mal - eh) because she saw it written on a little card next to the bassinet in the hospital stating the gender. Another named her son Meconium. Like, the .... yeah.

    I like classic names. I’m saddle with a long and complicated last name (which I love but find it annoying to spell for every single person that I come across). I wouldn’t want that for my child’s first name. I like classics, Katherine, Elizabeth, Simon… The most “out there” name I like is Aveline (ave-uh-line), which is a spin off of Evelyn. I’m not sure if I could use it as a first name or if it should stay as a middle name…

  4. By lceel on October 08, 2010

    I love the name Anais.  There was a woman named Anais Nin whose writing I love - my favorite quote of hers (and there are so many) is: “I am the keeper of fragile things, and I have kept, of you, what is indissolvable.“  She was involved for many years with Henry Miller - the man who wrote “Tropic of Cancer” - a book which was banned for many years.  She inspired much of what Henry wrote.

    Do you pronounce her name ana-ees (the second syllable should sound like EAST without the ‘T’)?

  5. By Mary on October 08, 2010

    First time commenter here!

    I also like classic names.  The most unusual name that I like is Honoria (ah-nah-ree-ah).  But now that I’ve thought about it so much, I feel like I have trouble judging how unusual it would seem to other people. 

    Another name trend I hate is when parents name each of their children with the same first letter.  It’s not AS bad as the strange-for-the-sake-of-strange names, but it still bothers me.  I can’t help but think that children are not collectibles!

    I met two girls once whose names were Trillion (yes, from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) and Tristany.  They had several brothers whose names were Jared, Jeremiah, Jeremy, etc.

  6. By Lauren on October 08, 2010

    There’s a blog out there somewhere of “confessions from a labor & delivery RN” or something along those lines. She rants about baby names in one or all of her posts and she says that, honest to God, she had a couple there once that heard a term being tossed about in the delivery room and said, “THAT’S A GREAT NAME” and used it.

    It was “Meconium.“

    Yes, they named their baby after uterus poop.

  7. By on October 08, 2010

    For a girl…Shithead…pronounced Sh-thee-ed….I am not kidding!

  8. By on October 08, 2010

    McLovin’

    No joke.

    For real.

  9. By Sarah Christensen on October 08, 2010

    Lauren - When I was in the hospital after giving birth to Charlotte, we asked the nurse what the strangest names she had seen were.  She said the worst was a little boy named Bubbles.  Now I wish I would have asked about people throwing around terms like placenta or meconium!

  10. By on October 08, 2010

    My husband once worked for a YMCA that had two young twin campers whose names were:

    Lemonjello (Le`-mon-gel-o) and Orangejello (Or-an-gel-o)

    Wow!

  11. By Elle on October 08, 2010

    Like Rebecca, most of the “out there” names that I hear I don’t remember or know how to spell and have tried to push them so far out of my memory in hopes that I will never hear them again. I think CPS should start stepping in when the names get too obscure.

    Although, my son is named Sebastian and before we knew that I’m currently pregnant with a girl (which will be Genevieve) we had planned to use the name Wolfgang for a second son. Most people looked at us like we’re crazy but some (smart, cultured) people got the classical music connection with Sebastian.

  12. By on October 08, 2010

    Precious Pride and Joplin Gumby.
    Nothing like being named after a giant green eraser.

  13. By beyond on October 08, 2010

    Himalaya is the strangest boy’s name that i know of. but i can’t get over the comments. wow. Himalaya seems almost like a classic next to some of these…

  14. By on October 08, 2010

    We named our daughter Arianna Francesca (francesca after her great grandmother) and people thought we were strange… i mean really? Arianna is strange? I knew a guy named Innocence.. and Arianna Francesca is odd? LOL People are forgetting some famous kids here… APPLE! remember that? why name your child after a fruit? amongst others. My name gets buttered on its own, (thanks ma!) so i cant imagine giving my child a complicated name. so far people have pronounced hers correctly so I think i am safe! Oh and I met a little boy when I worked at a day care years ago, named Seven. good times.

  15. By on October 08, 2010

    I love unique names HOWEVER. I think there is a limit.
    Even normal names can be a pain (how many people guessed that Corrine is NOT pronnounced Coreen? )

    This is totally not PC but I’m going to say it anyway.

    If you spell something wrong because you think it’s “unique” or cool, it’s not. It’s just spelled wrong.

    If you name your kid something you think is cool from another culture but you have no connection to that culture/country that’s not deep; it’s actually really superficial.

    Made up names, are just that…made up.

    This may not be fair but you are judged for your name. People will make assumptions about socioeconomic background/intelligence etc when they see an “unique” name on a resume or business card.

    I know this is cultural (for instance, in Ghana, people call their children Prince and Princess or they use the English translations of local names so you have kids called God’sgrace etc), but I think if you live in North America you should probably not make life hard for your kid by bucking all social convention LOL.

    One day your cute baby will be an adult applying for college/university/a job and that cute, original name you gave them will actually hold them back.

  16. By Liz on October 08, 2010

    I have a cousin who named her baby Hanna.  All I can think of when I see it is Hanna Barbera cartoons from my childhood.

  17. By Tracy Roberts on October 08, 2010

    Crash, as in like automobile.

  18. By Mailis on October 08, 2010

    Ryshawn. Pretty. And I freaking hate the Renesmee epidemic…LOL.

    Now, don’t get me wrong. I love unique names. If I ever have another boy, his name will be Ender. Yes, from the book “Ender’s Game”. *grin* BUT, names like Mooneye should be reserved for the fur-babies in your life. It’s only fair.

  19. By Sarah@Crazy Love Gamble-Style on October 08, 2010

    So while we are hashing out baby names I have a question.  What do you all think of naming a girl a predominately boys name?  I am pregnant with a girl who I am 97% sure we are naming Norah but I have been toying with the name Mason.  It seems many names have flopped from boy to being popular girl names, I think Mason is next but I wouldn’t want her to struggle with it if I am wrong.

  20. By on October 08, 2010

    Sorry, but if I had a dime for every aunt, uncle, cousin, co-worker, and camp counselor of Oranjello and Lemonjello I’ve now met, I could afford better booze. They now appear in Snopes.com, I believe.

  21. By Megan B. on October 08, 2010

    Someone spoke in my church once who was named Richard Head.  Apparently his parents didn’t know a certain common nickname for Richard.

  22. By Crystal on October 08, 2010

    Mary I laughed at your comment because I too disliked when parents named all their kids with the same first letter and have some how found myself in that situation. My husbands name starts with a C my name starts with a C and our son’s name starts with a C - not really thinking about it long term or anything and now if we have another baby I feel like it will be left out if we don’t give it a C name - LOL :)

  23. By Danica on October 08, 2010

    My Mom went to school with two poor siblings named Bunny and Peter. Their last name was Rabbit of course.

    I named my oldest Adora. I wanted something unique, but I also wanted something easy to say and easy to spell, because I grew up with people mispronouncing and misspelling mine and it was so annoying. Many of my family members didn’t like the name I chose for my daughter, but I don’t care.

  24. By Tabitha (From Single to Married) on October 08, 2010

    Oh… man, this is so true!  Sometimes I just wonder what people are thinking.  Don’t they know they’re setting up their kids for life?  Just the other week I had to go through almost 400 resumes for a position we were looking to fill.  Since we had so many applicants, I had to do a very preliminary run through and weed people out quickly.  One of the things that kept sticking out in my mind was people’s names.  I know I shouldn’t hold it against them, but when they have some really strange, made-up name, I can’t help but wonder about their performance.  I try not to act on that, of course, but it still crosses my mind. 

    Which is just one reason why we chose the name Henry for our son.  Simple, traditional, easy to spell.  :)

  25. By Sarahviz on October 08, 2010

    Absolutely agree with you.  I hate names where there are multiple spellings!  And?  I also hate names that can be for a boy or a girl.  Examples: Cameron, Dylan, etc.

    AND I sooo agree about middle names!  2 of my boyz middle names?  George and Job.  THAT’s how much I don’t care!

  26. By Sarah Christensen on October 08, 2010

    Okay, someone up there mentioned the name Seven?  I know SIX people who have daughters named Seven.  Six.  Okay, technically I only know four, but I’ve met the other two peripherally through mom groups and the like, so I’m counting them.  The oldest of them will be school-age next year so I’m kind of wondering whether it’s a popular name suddenly or it’s just a coincidence that I know that many little Sevens.

    Sarah Gamble - I don’t mind names that can go either way or that are predominantly boy names used for girls - but I do mind it the other way.  For example, I know little girls named Emerson and Ryan.  Both predominantly boy names and both names that I think are just fine on the girls.  I also know a woman who just named her baby girl Mason, but it was the mother’s maiden name so I’m not sure if that changes anything.  I think it’s fine, anyway.  It’s actually super cute.  The only problem I ever have with names like that where you can’t immediately decipher if it’s a boy or girl name is that sometimes if the kid isn’t clearly dressed in something that says ‘100% boy’ or whatever, I have to ask the parent.  And sometimes they get pissed off that someone can’t tell what their darling baby is.  And that isn’t fair - how am I supposed to know?  I’m trying to be thoughtful by asking and not assuming, SHEESH.

    Of course, I have a daughter I can nickname Charlie, so obviously I may be a bit biased.

  27. By Jenna on October 08, 2010

    I photographed 4 sisters named Pretty Girl, Gorgeouss, Beautiful, and Nunu.

    Poor Nunu.

  28. By on October 08, 2010

    I worked several years in a NICU.  We saw everything!  Often times I would speak to the new mother over the phone as she was still recovering and her newborn was on our unit.  When asked for the name of her new baby (so we could change baby boy/girl) on the bedside, I learned to brace myself.  I had a Kool-aid (she explained that she craved it throughout her pregnancy) and a Nicu (pronounce Nick-“U”) in tribute to baby’s arrival on our unit.  My response both times was…“well, lets not rush this.  A name is something your baby will have their entire life and we don"t need to fill out the birth certificate just yet.“  Another time during rounds the attending asked which nurse was taking care of Denise? It turns out that this little boy’s mother was planning to pronounce his name Da-Niss-E, but had accidentally named him a common girls name.  Fun phone calls to make, for sure!

  29. By Lauren @ In the Pudding Club on October 08, 2010

    In a baby name book I was looking at before we found the name Eloise, I came across the name Hamo.  No no. Let me say that again.  HAMO.  Hi.  My name is Hamo.  Like Ham with an Oh. on the end of it.

  30. By Eliza on October 08, 2010

    We named our daughter after my grandmother….so it is a family name…..Yeteva.  We call her Teva for short.  I love it and love that it honors my grandmother, but I know most people think I’m crazy or made it up.  People shouldn’t be so quick to judge unless they know the story behind it.

  31. By on October 08, 2010

    I work with unemployment claims and I have seen the whole spectrum of “unique” names.  We print them out and have a special place on the cubicle wall for them.  A coworker had me check out a claim yesterday.

    This is how he prefaced it:
    The pronunciation may give you some trouble, but think about it…

    Eureselick Guy

    I have no idea how he pronounces it, but seriously, You’re A Slick Guy??

  32. By mommica on October 08, 2010

    I love unique names and I think it is definitely a matter of opinion when it comes to what is strange and what is unique. My daughter’s name is Lillia - I find it unique and beautiful. I’m sure Shithead’s mother felt the same way. ;)

  33. By Sarah Christensen on October 08, 2010

    Eliza - As I said, I make exceptions for family names.  Honoring a relative or a very close family friend is always a beautiful thing, even if the name is a little off the beaten path.

  34. By on October 08, 2010

    I met a kid named Oom.  Seriously.  Oom.  Like what you say in yoga.  Poor Oom.

  35. By Lauren on October 08, 2010

    My midwife caught a kid whom the parents named Bundy Bear. (The mascot of Australia’s most prominent brand of rum.)

  36. By on October 08, 2010

    I am a NICU nurse and have seen LOTS of crazy names.  My favortire one lately was Richard The Third.  Yes, that makes his last name Third and his middle The.  We tried to explain that to the mother… she just didn’t get it.
    Another common trend is to pick a parents name then reverse the spelling.  Like dad is Davis, so kid is Sivad.  That example is not so bad.  Needless to say it can be much worse :)

  37. By Megan @ Mama Bub on October 08, 2010

    I can beat every single one of these. EVERY SINGLE ONE.

    I met someone who told me her daughter’s name was (pronounced) Absiddy. Spelled: ABCDE

    I shit you not. I’ve met this mother and child in the flesh.

    Oh, and my parents once bought a house from Dick Hare. If your last name was HARE wouldn’t you go by Richard?

  38. By Amber on October 08, 2010

    Okay, Megan. You are lying. DICK HARE?! That is fantastic!  And Mooneye. Mooneye?! Fabulous. I worked in Brooklyn Family Court for years. So I have too many favorites to count. I really enjoyed the sibling pair Love (boy) and Lovely (girl). Myhope was a good one. My husband (who I met in Family Court - as a lawyer NOT a litigant!) has a great one - Born Understandingjustice. The ultimate name is one that I can’t vouch for - it was an urban legend of sorts. The child’s name was pronounced Shith-eed. But it was not spelled that way. How was it spelled? I will just let you figure that one out.

  39. By on October 08, 2010

    These are all great!  I once knew a gal named Regina.  Printed, that looks fine.  However, you pronounced it, ‘Rah-gina’.  Rhymes with vagina.  Sheesh!

  40. By Megan @ Mama Bub on October 08, 2010

    So I should have read ALL of the comments to see that someone else also knows and Abcde. Maybe it’s the same baby!

  41. By on October 08, 2010

    This site has a great, LONG list of babies with unfortunate names… http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/index.html—too many to list here, but I think my favorites have been the famous ones that everyone knows:

    Jermaine Jackson (of the Jackson 5) named his son “Jermajesty” (sounds just like it looks jer-majesty - just terrible)

    Penn Jilette (of the comedy duo Penn and Teller) named his daughter “Moxie CrimeFighter” - Does he want her to be teased?

    And finally, Jason Lee (actor in “My Name is Earl”) named his son “Pilot Inspektor” - it feels like he’s trying to limit his son’s career choices AND teach him that learning to spell is optional?

    Ugh.

    On another note, I love boys names for girls, and have a particular favorite for a daughter if we ever have one, but prefer not to disclose it.  Thanks for the great conversation starter!  :)

  42. By Katelyn on October 08, 2010

    I got some raised eyebrows for Brooklyn.  I thought about two n’s and then figured that for the rest of my life I’d have to say, “Brooklyn with two n’s” and thought better of it…..I’ve seen some interesting names as a teacher.  Olstephanie was probably the weirdest, though I did have an Argentinian kid once named Facundo.  They called him “Facco”  for short.  Hard to explain to the parents that may not be nice in the future…...I’m not a fan of names spelled backwards…..Oh, and our neighbor’s kid is named Silver.  I’m not sure why….

  43. By Sarah on October 08, 2010

    My son is named after his father, so he is a second and we call him Deuce. I fought my husband on this in the beginning, but now, it really fits him. I get 2 reactions, shock or people who absolutely LOVE it. I like it because it is different, but whnever he becomes a professional whatever he dedides to be, he can go by his given name. I have a pet peeve about all the same initials but my biggest pet peeve is siblings whose names do not go together. Like Emily and Pixie. Stick with a theme people. Traditional or modern, I don’t care but make sure your kids’ names go!

  44. By on October 08, 2010

    Being a teacher, I’ve come across quite a few weird names.  One girl’s name was Dennys (pronounced like Denise).  I couldn’t help but think of a Grand Slam breakfast whenever I saw her name written at the top of her paper. 

    Another fun one was a boy named Bush (first name).  Wrong on so many levels!

    And last but not least, the kid I was HOPING to god would have a nickname, but instead insisted on being called by his full name—Talhuizculpa (pronounced Tal-loise-cul-pah).  Imagine trying to take attendance the first day of school and pronouncing that!  I’m a pro at saying it now, but man…that one took a while to master!

  45. By on October 09, 2010

    I used to complain because my mother named me a “nickname.“  My name is NOT Amanda, but over the years I’ve learned to just deal with it and sometimes answer to it.

    Worked in claims processing for a while at Blue Cross and had a running list of bizarre names.  Wish I could find it… there were some you would not believe.  The only ones I can remember now are some my sister told me about:

    Syphilis, pronounced like the name Phyllis with “suh” in front.

    Crystal Shanda Leer.  Middle names are important…

    Poor kids.

  46. By Christina on October 09, 2010

    My grandmother knew a girl called Marietta Grub. Really rolls off the tongue :)

  47. By on October 09, 2010

    The most craziest names ive heard are La-sha (La dasha) canqueesha (but we call her queenie) kendraya (we call her draya) ILovely( a lil girl i met at johns incredible pizza) and quia (quee-a, a friend of mine from highschool.)

  48. By on October 09, 2010

    Regina is a city in Canada, so perhaps that was why they named their child that. The first time I heard it, I was also shocked, I thought the person actually said vagina, until I heard it again.

    I’ve read all these comments, and I think a lot of the more common ones (shitthead, lemonjello, la-a) are probably made up. They’ve made their rounds about the internet and are probably not true. Just my thoughts. I could be wrong.

    I like unusual names, but not made up names. I don’t mind combined names such as Julianna and the like. As for misspelled names, I don’t mind them, sometimes a name becomes more common in the “misspelled” version. We named our son Malakai so he could have the nickname Kai, which just doesn’t work with Malachi. Other people misspell names to include names of family members.

    The most unusual name of someone I actually met was a little boy named Fox, which I thought was pretty cool. We met him at the playground and his mom was in labor. I was thinking up possible names for the little brother and though Wolf would be a good one. However, if it were ME, I wouldn’t use those for first names, possibly middle named, though. I agree that some parents don’t consider the future for their kids. How can you be taken seriously as a boss at a big office with the name “Rainbow Magic?“ You know what I mean?

  49. By on October 09, 2010

    I am also anti “name all your kids with the same first letter”
    I know a family….
    Their names are as follow:

    Tyler
    Tawni
    Teagan
    Talon
    Ty

    Tongue twister much? How am I suppose NOT get those confused?

  50. By on October 09, 2010

    One of the ladies where I go to get my nails done told me she named her son “Vons”.

    She explained, “ my watah broke at Von win I pregnant. So I name my baby Von.“

    He couldve got lucky and ended up with “Ralphs” or unlucky and ended up with the name “Ranch Market” or “Stater Bros” :)
    lol

  51. By on October 09, 2010

    Optimus Prime.

    From Transformers.

  52. By Sarah Christensen on October 09, 2010

    OPTIMUS PRIME?!

    Okay, Optimus Prime wins the bad name contest.  LMAO!

  53. By on October 09, 2010

    Someone I know from growing up named their son Eye Rah (said together it isn’t too bad, it sounds like his name is Ira).  What are they going to call him as a nickname?  Eye?

  54. By Shannon on October 09, 2010

    Huckleberry.  For realz.

  55. By Sydney on October 09, 2010

    As an expecting mother and new blogger, you are an inspiration. I nominated you for a blog award. Stop by to claim it!

  56. By on October 09, 2010

    Wouldn’t surprise me at all to meet someone who’d named their child “LOL” or “OMG” since people seem unable to spell or punctuate sentences (or even write complete ones) these days. It’s ridiculous.

  57. By on October 10, 2010

    When I lived in the deep south there was a cashier at my local grocery store who was named Shitonya.  The first time I saw her nametag I did a double take.  Who names their kid “Shit-on-ya” but it’s pronounced “Sheh-tonya”.  A friend of mine is a teacher in Southern California, she’s got some great names!  The best one was one of her students from a few years ago - Koblack.  His mother was Korean, his father was black, hence the name.  Also another great one from her classroom was Usnavy.  There is a HUGE sign at Camp Pendelton that says “US NAVY”, and the parents apparently loved the sign and pronounce the name “Ooos-nah-vey”.  I am all for giving a slight twist to your kids name, but man, some of these make me wonder what the parents were thinking!

  58. By on October 10, 2010

    Someone in my neighborhood named their daughter Dragon.Her middle name is Mackenzie, which is just fine, so I prayed they would just call her Mackenzie, but no such luck-  they call her Dragon, whenever I hear them calling for her it still shocks me- but to each their own!

  59. By Cambria on October 10, 2010

    The Naked Chef and wife named their newest addition to the family Poppy Blossom Rainbow

  60. By Huck on October 10, 2010

    Deladumone.

    Which kinda sounds like a normal name… but it’s a hormone used to suppress lactation. I can only imagine mothers in labor, or shortly after labor, hearing it spoken or seing it written in documents and thinking “My… that’s perfect!“

  61. By Stephanie on October 10, 2010

    I think…this is an interesting post. I have the feeling some of these names are culturally different from what the commenters are used to. If you live in a world in which everyone looks like you and names their child the same “classic” (heavy emphasis on quotation marks there) names that you like, then yeah, some names are going to be “weird.“

    As for the ones that are super out there or just spelled differently—I see where some of you are coming from, but I was totally blown away by the comment that said she judges applicants on their names, even if she knows she shouldn’t. That…blows my mind, and is totally disheartening.

    Ultimately, people can give their kid whatever names they want. If they kids hate them, they can change them. Kids pick on other kids for ALL KINDS of things, not just names, so even if someone is named Sarah Jane Smith, she’s probably going to be picked on for something else her parents “set her up for.“

    This post surprised me, for sure. And I didn’t take it personally (even though Jasper has quite a mouthful of names), I just didn’t expect it.

  62. By Jenn of organic-mama.ca on October 10, 2010

    Mooneye, wow. That’s…just wow.  Is the Jaiykub you met pronounced Jacob? Because that’s a normal name if so!

  63. By on October 10, 2010

    I can’t really think of any “real life” people I have met with weird names, unique and cool, but not weird. I think the weirdest is gwyneth paltrows daughter, Apple. wEird!!!
    My girls names are: Savannah Rose and Ava Katherine. I like different, but not weird!!!
    tara

  64. By Sarah Christensen on October 10, 2010

    Stephanie K - I guess I probably should have pointed out that I am totally cool with cultural ties in names.  To me, that falls under the same category as family names - it is always beautiful to tip your hat at your heritage.  But Mooneye was so named, according to his mother, because she wanted to name him “money” and just spelled the word incorrectly on the birth certificate.  She wanted to name him “money” because…???  Why?

    I guess I look at it like this: you don’t ever really change your name.  When Jasper is an adult, if he doesn’t like his name, he can legally change it.  And you might even call him by his new name.  But the name you gave him, Jasper, is still his name.  It is the very first gift (well, besides life) that you gave him and it is the one thing that he will take with him when he dies.  At least, that’s the way it is in our culture - people like me dislike certain names because the idea is that you give your child something they take with them from birth to death.  Your child, as a general rule, is not encouraged or expected to ever sit back and determine whether or not they find their name suitable - a name is just an identification tag and to some extent, whether we like it or not, whether the DMV issues a new name on the driver’s license or not, it is permanent.

    As with all things, parents have a right to name their children as they see fit.  Just as they have the right to feed their children as they see fit.  I happen to respect those rights up to a point - and as with all things, that point is just a random line drawn in the sand.  Everybody has their lines drawn in different locations and this is just one of mine.  I don’t judge the kids by their names but I do sometimes wonder what the parents were thinking.  When you name your kid Mooneye, are you really thinking about your child?  Ultimately, you don’t have to live with your choice, they do.

    Jenn - Jaiykub is pronounced Ji-cub.  Like the first part of “jive” and a bear cub.  It’s also a girl’s name.  To be fair, Jaiykub’s mother is someone I grew up with and have known for years and she has a very unusual name herself.  She thinks I’m crazy for picking a a run-of-the-mill name.

  65. By Catherine on October 10, 2010

    There’s a Charlie Cherry Sr. bridge in our town.  So, I"m guessing the Charles Cherry family is strong… I guess that’s not that crazy, but I keep thinking, Charlie Cherry, Chuckie Cherry, etc.  It just tickles me.  Other than that, I’ve met a Bjorn (but they were from Norway, but lived in Wisconsin), Renesme (no!!!!!!), Stormy goes to my son’s preschool….  My husband had a few goodies from his OB rotation days, but I’ve forgotten (or blocked) now.

  66. By on October 10, 2010

    The comment section in this post has been making me laugh so hard. My bf then introduced me to this website. FABULOUSITY!

    http://projects.ajc.com/names/search/?name=fartoon&gender;=

    Real names from the Georgia name search database.

    1. Aquemini
    2. Assonia
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    4. Daquantics
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    20. Shiteria (!)
    21. Smoothtavious
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  67. By on October 10, 2010

    gnurk gnurk gnurk
    i’m loving this post…
    thanks everybody for sharing
    in switzerland, you aren’t allowed to call your kid just any name. my co-worker used to work in a birthing center and some parents tried to call their kid Spatula. Didn’t work. ..

  68. By on October 11, 2010

    Yeah, it’s the same here in Austria. They will say no if you want to call your kid something crazy like Abcde. Thank god!

  69. By Jamielauren on October 11, 2010

    This is quite a popular topic!

    Working in social services I have heard ALL the crazy names there could ever be [the family obessesed with Dungeon’s and Dragons whose childrens names are Wrath, D’angel of Mercy, Empress, Enchantress & Diety] and ever where.  I’ve noticed that when you name your child ‘Precious’ they rarely ever are.  We have a family whose daughters are all named Peaches, Precious, Punkin [yes, P-U-N-K-I-N] and their newest arrival, a boy, is name Messiah Barack Ombama.  ::shakes head:: 

    We also have a social worker here named Pashyn [as in, ‘passion’] one named Sparkle and one named Ransome.  Can you imagine going before the judges and they have to call you PASHYN??  IN COURT? I just don’t get it and I think it’s kind of selfish to brand your child with your own strain of insanity.

  70. By amybeth on October 11, 2010

    @Mailis

    props.

    I’m gonna name one of my boys Ender too! Well, Andrew, but we’ll call him Ender! I love discovering another member of the Jeesh.

  71. By Sarah Christensen on October 11, 2010

    Emilie and Dett - We have family in a couple European countries who have said the same thing.  My understanding is that in Germany, you can only use a name that you can prove has historically been a name.  Is it like that in Switzerland and Australia or is it more subjective?

  72. By on October 11, 2010

    Any time someone looks at me with an apprehensive grin when I tell them my sons name is ‘jude’ will now be sent to this post! Hahaha

    I have had people ask ‘isn’t that a girls name’ and ‘how do you spell that?‘!! It’s four letters!!! It’s in the title of a hit song that I KNOW to have had to have heard at least once in your life time!! Come on people!

    I’m trying to now think of some of the worst names I’ve heard and can’t really come up with anything… I need to find me a liberal city to relocate to. That might help my list grow.

  73. By on October 11, 2010

    In my home town there is a lawyer whose name is Snow E. Bush III.  So not only does he has this name but he is the third in his family to have this name!  I agree that family names can be an exception but some names just need to die, at least in my opinion.  My husband’s grandfather was Velvan—a family name we will not be continuing.

  74. By Sarah Christensen on October 11, 2010

    Ellen - OH MY GOSH, I can’t believe I forgot about this, but for years and years there was a woman who worked near my city named Mary Christmas.  She married into the last name, so it’s not quite the same, but she would really go all out decorating for the holidays =)

  75. By on October 12, 2010

    Regina means Queen; it became popular because of Queen Victoria aka - Victoria Regina.

    It is a Latin word and only in Canada/North America is Regina said in a way that rhymes with vagina.

    Everywhere else Regina is said as it is in Latin…Regeena.

    Also, “Precious”  is a very common name in Ghana-it’s one of those local names to English translations. Although in my experience, most Ghanaians who move here use the names they got when Christened (if they are Christian, which many are).

  76. By Christi @ Rumination Avenue on October 12, 2010

    Shitay. Nuf said. Poor dear, she’s only 13.

  77. By on October 12, 2010

    @ Mehasssa

    I have actually met Lemonjello and Orangejello (atleast the ones to which I was referring), and despite what everyone on this blog post seems to think - these kids were amazing. Two twin boys with the spirit and enthusiasm for life that most people dream about.

    I suppose that is what you will find with most kids/people with uncommon names - despite what their parents manage to do to them they turn out alright.

    A name is a name. What matters most is the people we become.

  78. By on October 12, 2010

    No joke here, I knew a family who named there daughter “Who”. Nope- that’s not a type. WHO.

  79. By Sarah Christensen on October 12, 2010

    Jackie - Nobody’s arguing that the kids turn out just fine.  At the end of the day, I’d rather parents loved their children and treated them well than gave them a common name.  And I don’t even really care that much, honestly, even if using unique names is not a practice that I really identify with or always agree with.  What does bother me is that when I ask how to spell a name or pronounce it because it’s out of the ordinary, most of the parents act indignant.  Like it’s my fault that I couldn’t figure out that Mooneye was pronounced like Money.  Like it’s obvious.

    Easy solution: don’t name your kid Mooneye.

  80. By on October 13, 2010

    Sarah-

    I am not trying to argue the point either. I found your post to be funny and something I identified with. That was why I chose to leave a comment from an experience in my life (my first on this blog, although I have been a reader for some time).

    I just get frustrated when you put yourself out there and someone comes along and claims that you are making the whole thing up. Why would I write it if it weren’t true? I just think we should have more respect for other commenters than to assume that they are leaving false or made up information for no apparent reason. I don’t like being dismissed and found it to be quite rude. I didn’t want to leave it unanswered.

  81. By Sarah Christensen on October 13, 2010

    Jackie - OOOOH.  Okay, I’m with you, I can totally get behind that.  I’m sorry that I didn’t catch that and address it earlier.

  82. By on October 13, 2010

    My father had a classmate in high school named Dee Cupps. The most unfortunate part was that she was indeed large-chested. Bless her heart!

  83. By on October 14, 2010

    Motorola Smith?  Gay Laughter?  Pearly Everlasting SInger?  Real people, I have met each of them.

    My own sister had the good sense to be born a girl.  If she had been a boy, my mom would have named her Csaba Attilla. Great in Hungary, not so great in America.

  84. By on October 16, 2010

    Oh my goodness what a fantastic comment chain! :)  I personally have a coworker (now a good friend) named Antronette—yes, with an r. I think it’s beautiful now, but it took me about a month to get the pronunciation down!  And did anyone here watch Stargate Atlantis? One of the main (male) actors was named Rainbow Sun Francks. 

    Until now I thought I loved weird names. But Mooneye is awful. What makes it more awful, Sarah? Is that the mother didn’t know how to spell Money. :(

    Book names I definitely love!  My husband and I are both big readers, I can see us naming our children after literary characters someday.

    Personally I prefer neutral gender names. My mother named all my siblings with neutral gender—for the precise instance described above by the woman who flicks through resumes and judges by name! My mother didn’t want people to be able to discriminate against us just because we were female. I like to think we live in an age where that won’t happen anymore; but the fact that she thought it necessary when we were born is an interesting little peek back at the past. I’m lucky to have such a caring woman for a mother. (And Sarah @ Great Love—I think Mason would be a great girl’s name!)

    Thanks for the laugh Sarah! ^.^

  85. By Andrea on October 22, 2010

    Most horrid?

    La-a.

    Pronouced “Ladasha”

  86. By Clare on October 29, 2010

    I am a little behind on reading blogs… but this chain was awesome. I knew a Rosanne Rosanna.  Neither bad names but as her parents couldn’t agree she got named both!

  87. By on August 20, 2011

    As a teacher I came across Rayban (named for parents’ favorite shades), Usmail ( US Mail), and Denny’s (after the diner, apostrophe of the birth certificate), all boys. When my brother was born my mom’s hospital room mate named her son Blaze…  last name was Romance.

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