The numbers.
June 27, 2012

NO, I am not dead.  I did not drop off the face of the planet.  I was not eaten alive by zombies.  The last four days were just really REALLY miserable and I haven’t had the time or energy to add blogging to the list when basic things like PEEING and BREATHING and STANDING were taking so much damned concentration.

But now that things seem to be improving, here are the last four days of Christensen existence for you.  If things continue to improve today, maybe I’ll take some belly pictures for you.  I’m 21 weeks along and the belly is coming along nicely.  But there’s also a good chance that I’m going to spend the day sleeping, drinking fluids, taking short walks, and sleeping some more.  So don’t hold your breath.

6 – Time I woke up on Saturday morning with the fiercest bladder infection of my life.

1 – Number of bean burritos I ate on Friday evening that landed me with five solid hours of diarrhea while dealing with The Bladder Infection From Hell.

3 – Hours we postponed leaving on our weekend road-trip due to my inability to live independently of a toilet for longer than 15 minutes.  In retrospect, I probably should have just stayed home and gone to urgent care.  But I lack vital problem-solving skills, so nooooo, I went.  Moron.

6 – Individual-serving-size bottles of cranberry juice my husband picked up for the road.

40 – Grams of sugar per bottle of cranberry juice, which promptly gave me a nasty headache and turned my stomach.

250ish – Miles from Los Angeles to Las Vegas.

40 – Average number of miles we were able to travel between frantic bathroom stops.

1 – Number of back injuries I sustained from, YOU CAN LAUGH, THIS IS SORT OF FUNNY, running desperately to the bathroom.  Like a cliché pregnant woman.  I AM NEVER GOING TO LIVE THIS ONE DOWN.

9 – Time that Charlotte and I ducked out of the event we’d traveled 250ish miles to attend.  It was a fun 90 minutes while it lasted.

30 – Seconds in took for Charlotte to fall asleep after I told her that what would really make me feel better was cuddling in the dark.

16 – Number of times I vomited in a four-hour span, alone in a dark hotel room, because the food at the event did not agree with the nausea all the sugar from the cranberry juice had caused.

12 – Number of tries it took for Donald to get into the hotel room because I accidentally dead-bolted him out and then fell asleep so that I couldn’t hear my cell phone ring or him knocking on the door.

11 – Time we checked out of the hotel on Sunday morning, with every intention of making it home as fast as humanly possible so that me and my bad back and my sorry excuse for a bladder could recuperate in comfort.

7.5 – Hours it took us to drive from Las Vegas back to Los Angeles after we stopped at every available rest stop, hit traffic, and took Charlotte to the desert roadside nature bathroom.

8 – Number of times we listened to the same CD of Charlotte’s music in the car during those hours.

24 – Number of hours I spent on Monday complaining about my bad back and my sorry excuse for a bladder.

40 – Minutes it took to reach the midwifery center on Tuesday for an appointment.

2 – Hours we spent talking about cranberry juice, dehydration, bladder and kidney infections, muscle injuries, and the like.

7 – Grams of sugar per serving in the cranberry juice the midwife recommended.  Much easier on the head.  Much fouler on the tastebuds.

3 – Number of hours we spent in Labor and Delivery at the local hospital on Tuesday night after blood began showing up in my urine.  We rushed out and left Charlotte with my parents.  She was too busy enjoying dinner to notice we’d left.

14 – Pills in the antibiotic prescription I was given.

1 – Hour in the morning Donald went out to a 24-hour pharmacy to pick up the antibiotic prescription.

7 – The number of days I am told it will take for my infection to clear up.

4 – The number of weeks I am told it will take for my back injury to heal.

6 - Horror stories from pregnancy that I have heard or read over the last two days (like someone on Facebook mentioning that they threw a rib out of place?!) and thought these people are amazing.  I would have curled up in a corner, cried, and then spent the next ten years bitching about it.

10 – The rating Charlotte would give the weekend, which just goes to show that in the eyes of a three-year-old, a hotel swimming pool is magic.


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  1. By Alicia S. on June 27, 2012

    Well, at least you come out of this with some stories, right?? I’m sorry you had such a rough week. I remember what it’s like to feel like crap on a stick when you’re pregnant. Despite myself, though, I must have checked your blog no less than 9 times to see if you’d posted anything yet, lol… Don’t stress about posting anything until you feel better. I’m sure if you had to go a month without writing, not one of us would stop checking back. Just get your rest!

    Also, my husband’s in Canada on a two-week fishing trip, so the kids and I took the weekend to make a road trip up to my brother’s in upstate New York. 6 hours there, 6 hours back. You know what made it totally worth it to both of them? Hotel pool and my brother’s trampoline. :-)

  2. By on June 27, 2012

    WHOA that sucks ! sorry your weekend was so bad.
    Somedays you just wonder what you did to deserve such crap, right ?
    Alice and I send you a HUGE HUG, feel better xx

  3. By Heather on June 27, 2012

    Ah, bladder infections suck and are the bane of my existence. Cranberry juice is no good without the sugar but who can consume all that sugar? They make cranberry juice extract pills that have the same fantastic cranberry juice effect…just a thought.

    Hope you feel better, but at least Charlotte had fun, right??

  4. By on June 27, 2012

    So awful!  Glad you are alive : )  I used to have chronic bladder infections (one a month for no apparent reason).  I don’t drink cranberry juice because there really isn’t THAT much vit C in it, IF I get one now, I just take a shit load of vitamin C pills.

  5. By Sara on June 27, 2012

    Oh, Sarah…this post made me laugh and cry for you, and silently say a prayer of thankfulness that my pregnancy is over. get lots of rest, and fluids!! could you mix the cranberry juice with a sparkling water or ginger ale or something to make it taste a bit better?

    that drive from LA to Las Vegas is brutal. and I’m pretty sure that I’ve vomited in nearly every rest stop bathroom too. in fact, the last time we went J (when I was pregnant with Ali), just pulled over the side of the road. awful.

  6. By missjoules on June 27, 2012

    Oh my goodness, WHAT a weekend! I’m glad that it is over for you and that it is the last of your busy weekends for some time, it will be good for you to have a bit of time to recuperate. I hope that you are feeling better soon. I’m glad that Charlotte at least had a nicer time!

  7. By on June 27, 2012

    I get UTI’s all the freaking time! My last one was awful, I couldn’t pee and the pee that did come out was blood.

    I haven’t had one in a few months, which is a good stretch for me. I try to drink 2 or 3 glasses of water after dinner and before bed at 11 or 12. It’s seemed to help a lot, I have to pee like a crazy person first thing in the morning, but it’s like it’s diluting the yuck in my urine at night. I don’t know…

    I also use those cranberry pills if I forget about the water.

    Also, with the no added sugar cranberry juice, I add club soda and lime or lemon juice. It makes for a good mocktail.

  8. By Kaylie on June 27, 2012

    The one who threw a rib out of place was me! Is it weird that I’m excited that I sorta got a mention on your blog?

    And my mom is upset that I’m never getting pregnant again. I told her that if we really want another baby, we’ll adopt. She threw a rib out of place with my sister, so you think she would understand.

    I totally feel for you. Rest as much as you can! The cranberry juice with club soda and lemon sounds like a delicious mocktail!

  9. By Sarah Christensen on June 27, 2012

    I cannot believe how many people live with chronic UTIs.  You people must have the patience of saints.  This is only my second one and both times I’ve basically dissolved into a blubbering mess on the floor and spent the ensuing week complaining lol.  I’m a UTI wimp!

    Kaylie - I would have mentioned you by name, but I never know if that weirds people out or not!  I visibly shuddered when I read that you’d thrown your rib out of place.  OUCH!

    Megan - Is it the Vitamin C in cranberry juice that’s supposed to do the job?  I would happily switch over to something a little…er…LESS OFFENSIVE if it served the same purpose.

  10. By Jillian on June 27, 2012

    7 days for it to work???  I had a whopper bladder infection a few months ago, within 24 hours I was peeing blood too.  I got an antibiotic and it started feeling better within 24 hours and I was feeling almost normal after 48.  So, don’t lose hope!  I’ve also read that cranberry juice (even the low sugar kind) isn’t really that helpful once you already have a bladder infection.  It MIGHT help if you still just have a UTI or mild discomfort, but if it’s going to be a bladder infection, gallons of the stuff won’t do anything (believe me, I’ve tried).  I’ve narrowed it down to prevention now.  I ALWAYS pee after sex now, without fail.  I drink tons of water before if I must or down it afterwards like a madwoman until I do pee (not sure what your issue might be, I know my mom literally has to use a mild disinfecting wash after doing her business, every time, or she gets chronic infections.  Everyone is different, and some people are just prone to them.).  Good luck and I hope you feel better ASAP.

  11. By Sarah Christensen on June 27, 2012

    Jillian - My issue just seems to be in pregnancy.  If I get even remotely dehydrated during pregnancy, BLADDER INFECTION!

    I took the first pill last night and I already feel a million times better, so I’m thinking maybe they just say seven days so that if you don’t react immediately you don’t call them up furious?  My back is already feeling much better than it did on Saturday too, so my guess is that the pain will mostly dissipate within a week and then the 4 week guideline they’re giving me is just for everything to heal up completely.

  12. By Heather on June 27, 2012

    Ouch… Sounds like you have had a rough few days. Hope you feel better soon.

    P.S. Yes, the rib thing happens. I threw a rib out when I was pregnant with my son because I threw up every day for six weeks.

  13. By on June 27, 2012

    Sorry for your miserable weekend! I had crazy back pain when I had a kidney infection, (cause that’s where your kidneys live!) so I’m almost wondering if your back pain was from that, rather than an injury.

  14. By christy on June 27, 2012

    yikes!! that would be enough to kill an average human!  hope you get to feeling better soon!

  15. By on June 28, 2012

    i agree with Erica, i had a bladder & kidney infection this winter and it took forever to find out what it was, because all the pain was located in my lover back ...

  16. By on June 28, 2012

    Sarah!
    Wow!  What a traumatic weekend!
    I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and love it! 
    If you haven’t heard about Bowenwork, you should check it out.  I’m a massage therapist and have had such amazing results personally (i.e. disappearance of ovarian cyst that was large enough to have surgeon suggest removal of entire ovary, resolution of chronic neck pain that monthly chiropractic sessions didn’t help with, etc.) that I’m in the process of converting my practice to exclusively Bowenwork.  It might help your back and UTI to resolve a bit faster.  Also, it is incredibly relaxing!

    Here is the website to look up more information.
    http://www.bowenworkacademyusa.com/resources/resources

    Click on “The Bowenwork answer book” for more detailed information about it.

    Sorry if this comes across as a sales pitch!  It’s not my intention.  I hope you feel better soon!

  17. By Sarah Christensen on June 28, 2012

    Erica and Emilie - That’s what the midwife and the ER doctors thought too, but my cultures suggested that it was just a bladder infection?  Certainly I still have back pain even though the bladder pain has receded with the antibiotics, but it’s also very much reduced.  I’m leaning toward a combination of the two ideas - maybe the infection was just beginning to move into my kidneys and then I hurt my back, so the pain in my back increased accordingly and once the antibiotics kicked in it made it more liveable?  I don’t know.


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