What I did not do this weekend…
July 20, 2009

We had a very busy weekend.  Or, rather, we had a weekend that was as busy as a weekend can be when you are waiting for a baby to weasel its way out of a woman.

On Saturday morning, for example, we watched a film together.  I did not go into labor.

Later, our outdoor thermometer hit 105F.  I’m not sure, but I think that skin pretty much melts off the human body at this temperature.  I did not go into labor.

As a response to the unholy temperature, I laid bare-ass-naked underneath the ceiling fan in our bedroom and fell asleep.  My husband ridiculed me, but I did not go into labor.

We took several long walks.  I did not go into labor.

We attended a family gathering.  I did not go into labor.

We fell asleep.  I did not go into labor.

On Sunday morning, we attended a weekly waffle breakfast with my folks and my sibs and their significant others.  I did not go into labor.

Then we came home and I decided to get an early start on the laying bare-ass-naked stuff.  My husband ridiculed me some more.  I did not go into labor.

We discovered that if you look up “fears” in the Mayo Clinic pregnancy book, you will be directed to look up “irrational fears.”  HONESTLY.  I laughed hysterically.  I did not go into labor.

Afterwards, I fell asleep.  Donald got a hair cut.  I did not go into labor.

Yesterday evening, we took Hank for his second walk of the day and spent some time hanging out with my dad.  We showed him our priceless Mayo Clinic find.  I did not go into labor.

We ate a very late dinner and watched a film together last night.  I did not go into labor.

So now that you’re caught up on my weekend, what was yours like?


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  1. By Kathleen North on July 20, 2009

    Fooey. I was so sure that since you did not update over the weekend that you were certainly having a baby. Maybe today? :)

  2. By WaltzInExile on July 20, 2009

    Oddly, I, also, did not go into labor.

    But since you’re the only one of us who’s pregnant, I didn’t really expect to.

    I did get to watch the new puppy like a hawk to make sure we didn’t have any more accidents, though.  And that was sort of exhausting.  Not lie-naked-under-ceiling-fan exhausting, though, so you totally win.

  3. By Veronica on July 20, 2009

    I didn’t go into labour either. But then, I’m not pregnant so it’s not surprising. I hope it happens soon for you.

  4. By Veronica on July 20, 2009

    Oh and then I look and find I’ve commented almost exactly the same thing as Waltz (I didn’t read comments first, promise). Great minds maybe?

  5. By Homeslice on July 20, 2009

    i think it’s time to resort to nipple stimulation to induce labor. worked wonders for me.

  6. By kbreints on July 20, 2009

    LOL…. oh this waiting stuff is for the birds! Have you tried spcy foods?

    ohh… that will just giv eyou heart burn anyway…

  7. By Jinxy @ Jinxyisms on July 20, 2009

    I’m sorry you didn’t go into labor.

    I made sweet potato baby food for my girl and she loved it.

  8. By Vicky on July 20, 2009

    It was a 116 or so here, so yea skin doesn’t melt yet.
    I was hoping I would log on and see you that you had gone into labor. Bummer, I’m sorry!!
    I made a blanket this weekend, my boy starts pre-school today. I wanted him to have a special blanket for nap time. :0)

  9. By C @ Kid Things on July 20, 2009

    I was just thinking about you, wondering if you had gone into labor. Obviously not.

  10. By Julie Rivera on July 20, 2009

    Instead of just stalking you, Sarah, I now feel like I am stalking this baby. :) I cannot imagine the constant strain of waiting past your due date…my sister never went into labor with her firstborn but found, at 41+ weeks, he was footling breech and had to be extracted. It did save her labor pains… :)

  11. By Notesfromthegrove on July 20, 2009

    If it makes you feel any better, I did not go into labor this weekend either.

    But then again, I’m not pregnant, so…yyyeeeaaah.

  12. By Yankee Wife on July 20, 2009

    i thought for sure i’d see baby pictures this morning…. :(  don’t you worry, one day this will be a fun memory

  13. By repliderium.com on July 20, 2009

    I think you should have an ultrasound to see if the kid has furniture and shit in there. It sounds like it’s camping out for a while.

  14. By Jaye @ canadian-mom.ca on July 20, 2009

    Boo :( What is this kid thinking? Doesn’t he know that all the fun stuff like pooping and barfing happens OUTSIDE THE WOMB? Gees, kid.

  15. By Obi-Mom Kenobi on July 20, 2009

    Cleaned the house. Had breakfast with good friends and saw Harry Potter. I did not go into labor.

  16. By Hokie Deb on July 20, 2009

    —>The baby will come out eventually.

    I went to a HUGE Woodstock party on a lake. It was grooovyyyy…......

    http://www.WebSavyMom.com

  17. By Megan at FASS on July 20, 2009

    One of your comments recommended nipple stimulation.  I was taught that at my birthing class as a great method!!  Rub ‘em a lil.  Might be nice!  Donald might like to try!!

  18. By Trenches of Mommyhood on July 20, 2009

    Opening your blog these days is like the anticipation of opening a present.  I keep holding my breath for that big-ass picture of a newborn.  Can’t wait to hear!

    Keep laying nekkid if it makes you feel better.

  19. By Elizabeth on July 20, 2009

    sounds like mine…a bunch of stuff and no labour, thank Heaven.  Thinking of you this morning….

  20. By Molly Chase on July 20, 2009

    I went into labor on my way to or from my last doctor’s appointment with both my kids. Schedule a doctor’s appointment. Works every time.

  21. By Elizabeth Mackey on July 20, 2009

    GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I hope it heard me scream that to hi or her from Nor Cal!!!

  22. By Wild Dingo on July 20, 2009

    I love how that creepy baby monitor thing on your site is going UP in days… LOL! i think you should take it down and then you’ll go into labor. it’s bad labor joo joo to have it going UP in days…

  23. By Megan on July 20, 2009

    I DID NOT GO INTO LABOR EITHER! 

    I got a hair cut, went for a hike saw horses inches from my face, went out to eat, hung out w/my husband, went to super target, walked around Denver, went to Boulder and a farmer’s market.

    I’ve heard castor oil induces labor, but the diarrhea side effect turns some off…would you try that?

  24. By Stephanie on July 20, 2009

    Hey, I did NOT go into labor, either!!

    However, I don’t want to be going into labor anytime soon.. I’m not due till November 18th. Give me a good 15 weeks and then I can go anytime.

  25. By Brittany at Mommy Words on July 20, 2009

    Have you seen the baby evixtio notice…here it is…

    I, the Landlord (Mommy), am issuing a 7-day notice for EVICTION. Tenant (Baby) will have to comply and promptly vacate the premises, or wait until authorization for removal by physician. After which, she will be removed from the property by induction.

    The Tenant (Baby) is being evicted due to breach of contract and destruction of property. Expansions only to the FRONT of the house, within reasonable limits, were discussed. Not only have these limits been exceeded, but additions to the back and sides of the house were also made without approval from the Landlord (Mommy).

    Remodeling and gutting of the home was never approved, nor was changing the initial layout and base structure. Due to the damage by the Tenant (Baby), the foundation has been compromised, and the structural integrity of the house is questionable. The Landlord (Mommy) has also received numerous complaints about frequent nightly disturbances.

    If the Tenant (Baby) doesn’t comply with the notice it will result in a removal at the discretion of a physician and the Landlord (Mommy).

    I laughed when I was overdue and saw this.

    Can’t wait for the baby pictures!

  26. By Alias Mother on July 20, 2009

    Every time you put up a “not yet” post I flashback to my own endless, endless wait.  You have my complete and total empathy.

    Dear baby: leave.  Now.

  27. By Stephanie on July 20, 2009

    Althouuuuugh….today is the day? :) I hope so! For all three of you.

  28. By Heidi on July 20, 2009

    My weekend was awesome. Thanks for asking!

    I got drunk twice. Hungover once. Spent Friday night dancing to techno music at a club called Esca and then Saturday night hosting a party at my house, during which I took full advantage of what some folks call, “the hair of the dog.“

    Glad to see you’ve embraced nudity under the ceiling fan. I nursed my hangover in exactly the same way.

    God speed, Sarah. I can’t wait for the day that I sign onto your Lance and WHAM-O get slapped with a picture of you and Jason Segel looking all glassy-eyed with your newborn and matching hospital bands. :)

  29. By TheFeministBreeder on July 20, 2009

    Okay, you have to stop thinking of this as your body not going into labor, and start realizing that this is your baby not being done doing what they need to do in there.  When baby is done cooking, he/she sends a signal to your brain to start the labor process. Until then, they’re doing their thing.

    This is a very, very good lesson in what the rest of your life is going to be like - baby runs the show.  For the rest of these baby years, you won’t sleep, eat, or even pee until that baby’s needs are met.  This will teach you patience better than a Tibetan monk could. ;)

    Hang in there.  Just remember all the other things you didn’t have to do this weekend, like change diapers, or stay up for 72 hours at a time with a brand new teeny squawking human.

    All in due time.

  30. By Jennifer W. on July 20, 2009

    I flew on a plane twice in five days, stayed in a college dorm and slept with my husband on two twin beds pushed together.  Oh, all with a 15 month old.  Granted, it was a better time than how you’re going to feel a few days after giving birth but still, I think I won.  Here’s to hoping for baby this week.  I’ve got a feeling about July 21 or 22.  KEEP THE ADDICTS UPDATED.

  31. By Nin on July 21, 2009

    Go to see an acupuncturist of acupressurist, there’s a specific point underneath your ankle that gets the baby to descend way down into the birth canal and induce labour. I had treatment in the morning, kept stimulating the point throughout the day, went for a nice long walk in the evening and then the contractions started. I *swear* it works. My therapist has treated 5 ladies now, and has worked for all of us!

    And good luck! Also, take the time to rest in the first 24 hours post partum, baby doesn’t demand much then so you have time to gather yourself together after birth. After that it gets progressively harder during the first couple of weeks. And if you still have time, COOK MEALS AND FREEZE THEM! Will make life so much easier for first week or so xx

  32. By Jena Simms on July 21, 2009

    Attended six basketball games (I have three very athletic boys). Made sure my husband didn’t have a heart attack (he is the coach). Had a birthday party for my husband and decided to have 17 year old step son and 8 year old nephew stay with us for the week maybe two weeks. Really hope you update soon, I want to see that little winkietink of yours reallllllly soooon!


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